Confessions Of A Print Addict

print clothingI have something to confess.


I am a fully fledged, paid up member of Print Addicts Anonymous. It’s true, open my wardrobe and you would be forgiven for thinking you had walked into a 1970s curtain sample shop.


I have skirts covered in bikes, dresses with more pot plants on than B&Q and countless floaty, flowery blouses.


There are stripes, spots, animals, weather systems.  You name it, I own a garment covered in it. All well and good. If it fits and suits, there’s nothing wrong with a bit of print. That is until the moment you realise there is no way you could reach into your wardrobe and bring out two random items that don’t immediately induce a migraine.


I am having this revelation daily as I struggle to pair ANY of my clothes with anything other than jeans or plain t-shirts. As I hurtle towards 30 I am also beginning to wonder how long I have left to pull off t-shirts with cats on.


This afternoon I went shopping in a bid to grow-up my wardrobe. I was looking for flattering lengths, skin enhancing tones and anything that would make me look less of a children’s television presenter. I was adamant that come closing time I would have a bag full of items that would Audrey Hepburn the life out off myself.


As it is, I am sat surrounded by even more peices that will ensure I spend my middle age looking more Pollard than Hepburn. I NEED HELP!


I need to realise that a black dress is beautiful as it is, it doesn’t need a flock of birds to make it soar. A white shirt is entirely more sexy than one that has anchor shaped buttons. A black t-shirt does more for my skinny jeans (and my gently plumping figure) than the hundreds I have depicting various members of the animal kingdom.


Once I learn these print detoxing lessons I may just begin to exude the grace and understated elegance that I crave.  It’s either that or dress like a clown for the rest of my life.


Just don’t open my underwear drawer….



1 Comment

  1. Ruby says:

    Ha ha ha! This made me laugh out loud! I know someone just like you and have been rather jealous of her quirky clothes sense! I think maybe she has magpie tendencies for sparkly things and interesting prints! As for shoes and handbags!!!! Just don’t go there!!! I think having both looks ready to go depending on your mood and the occasion is a great idea. Don’t go printless just yet!!! Prints are awesome!! If Flight of the Conchords can wear animal pictures then so can you!