Applying for a job is similar to searching for that perfect man. You spend hours hunting for the one that excites you, and ask every step of the way if you see a future between the two of you. But while companies and potential employers grill you more than a George Foreman about your past credentials, that potential mate keeps his skeletons hung in the closet; meaning you are blissfully unaware of his inability to commit to anything other than a footie season ticket.
While job hunting the other day I thought ‘wouldn’t it be great if finding a man followed the same rules as finding a job?’ The idea of sifting through candidates and thrashing it out in the boardroom before you’d even contemplated the bedroom is a funny yet practical approach to modern dating. If I look back and count all the times I have wasted dating men who are still stumbling out of the starting blocks, while I am strides ahead when it comes to commitment, I would probably get about 6 months of my life back; that’s a heck of a lot of window shopping and Beckham perving time ladies.
This relationship CV would tell you everything you needed to know about that seemingly perfect bloke, such as how many women he has bedded, how committed he really is and of course it would have to include references from his ex-girlfriends. While Kleenex will notice a drop in tissue sales, you’d be too busy living it up rather than crying over a man who clearly didn’t want anything more than a Misteeq one night stand.
Perhaps relationships would be better ending like a termination of a job contract too, as writing ‘I regret to inform you that you are no longer suitable as my boyfriend, due to your attraction to other women’ has a certain authoritative tone to it; something which is bound to impress Lord Sugar.
While a little mystery is healthy in any relationship, finding out the truth early on can save a visit to the Mope Motel, and until the day men and women are more upfront with each other, we will have to accept that some romances go through a lot of paperwork and rejection before reaching the next stage of interviews.