How many epic romance films have you seen? Or cheesy romance movies for that matter? Where eventually, everything pans out just the way the hero/heroine wanted it too.
How many beautiful love stories have we been told over the years? When in the end, even if things don’t exactly go to plan, everyone learns a valuable lesson about love.
How many times have we been led to believe the risks in romance are worth it? And that if you have the guts to wear your heart on your sleeve like your newest accessory your Prince Charming will come along on a white stallion… or in his Vauxhall Nova, on his skateboard or BMX… whatever mode of transport floats your boat.
Is it really healthy for us to be pumped with ideas that truth will out, there is one person for everyone and that love actually does conquer all? But on the other end of the spectrum, I cant seem to accept that it’s a good idea to believe that every person is out for themselves, everyone actually loves themselves more than they can ever love another and in the end you always get screwed over.
Now, like most people I’ve had my heart broken, and I have broken hearts. I have been cheated on and I have also strayed before. Some men I have genuinely liked and some women I have liked even more so. I normally would say that honesty is the best policy, and I’ve always skipped the game playing and got straight to the point when it comes to dating. If I want someone, I have never been shy about trying to make it happen. If I like someone I wont necessarily wait for them to call me, and I certainly never do the whole “text back to every second message” thing or whatever else the supposed rules are.
BUT I have to admit, some recent events in my not so successful love life, and the equally as tragic lives of my friends, has lead me to doubt my usual plan of action. Maybe sometimes, just sometimes, playing the games is the safer bet than just grabbing the bull by the horns.
The whole concept of playing a game is that eventually there is a winner, so logic states that if you play along you have a chance of getting what it is you want. You’ve got to be in it to win it right?
Whereas grabbing the bull by the horns seems to be a lot more risky and can result in you being savagely beaten (emotionally of course) by said angry bull who doesn’t necessarily like you man handling his horns…
My emotions took a particularly painful beating recently when I finally plucked up the courage to get on a male friend of mine that I have quite literally fancied the underwear and socks off since I met him nearly a year ago. It was a good night, it was definitely worth it. But the risk I took the next morning definitely wasn’t and I certainly didn’t get my epic romance novel ending. Thinking that I didn’t want to waste any more time I told him quite openly and honestly that actually I would quite like to get on him more often. I didn’t exactly get the response I had hoped for. And I can’t help thinking had I played the game; waited for him to call me, not text him for a couple of days, waited until I saw him next and was conveniently wearing a provocative outfit, would things have panned out differently? Maybe. Would I have spared my dignity and humiliation? Probably.
Next time I think my heart is being safely tucked away in my pocket and I’m rolling the dice instead.
Image courtesy of worth1000.com