Saying Goodbye

Saying goodbye to someone is the hardest thing in the world to do, and it is always something you run through in your head, what do you say? How do you say it? Can I change their mind? It is a moment when all your emotions are left on show, and it is a moment that never seems to get easier, so is there a way to make it easier?

Saying goodbye comes in all different forms, someone could be dying, a relationship could be lost, a marriage is breaking down, you could be saying goodbye to children leaving home, but generally they all come with a certain amount of emotion, and the most important thing about saying goodbye in any form is to make sure they see that emotion. Letting someone know how you feel is something we should all do, and if this really is goodbye, then letting them know once more is not a bad thing, it shows you care.

When someone leaves we run through how we will hold the conversation, we experiment with the mirror (maybe that’s just me) you think about all the things they will say in reply, you try and think of answers for them, you think of the last thing you want to say to them before they go, but when you get to the point of saying goodbye, you remember none of it, and instead have to just go off your instinct, and shoot from the heart, and that’s important. Scripting a conversation isn’t the way to say goodbye, planning what to say won’t work because you will always forget that small element, and you will kick yourself for doing so, and the fact is, planning it is just a way of acting out the emotion, although inside you feel strongly, if it’s planned, then it’s just a performance, and this is a time when a performance isn’t needed, it’s the time when been yourself is the most important thing.

When saying goodbye there is the chance that we will get caught up in the emotion, and spend more time crying than we do actually saying goodbye. It’s important to remember that if someone is leaving, and this is potentially one of the last times you will see them, then try and enjoy the moment. Although there are a number of reasons why you could be saying goodbye, it’s important to remember you do love this person, and you only get one chance to say goodbye once. Saying goodbye can be a happy time, it can be a time to reflect on the fun, the good moments, it doesn’t have to focus on saying sorry and past problems, it’s now about moving forward, and in whatever sense, everyone has to move forward, and that’s easier to do with happier thoughts in your mind.

Saying goodbye isn’t easy, but there are way to make it easier, and that lies in what you’re saying goodbye to. If you’re saying goodbye to someone whom you love, and will miss, then it’s important that you remember the happier times, because they’re the moments you want with you, the bad memories can all be let go, and forgotten, because now is a time for moving forward. Scripting a goodbye will never work. Say goodbye because you love them, not because it’s what you think will sound good.


Sean Bromley