The world we live in is full of bad news, every time you turn on any news channel, more often than not it is delivering some depressing information that you’d frankly rather not know. Although, there are times in life when fate, destiny, God – whoever is in control of things – dishes someone a decent hand, and that happened this morning; not to me, but to my best friend of several years who this morning, on her birthday of all days, got engaged to the man she has been madly in love with for the past two years.
It might not seem that long, but in those years he’s pulled her through her A Levels, her parents’ divorce and the start of her degree, and she’s pulled him through buying into a restaurant, clearing old debts and moving out of his parent’s house – finally! They’ve also dealt with things that hit them as a couple, the grubby details of which I won’t go into. I’m optimistic that they will live a long and happy life together, after the stuff they’ve already been through I’d be very surprised if they weren’t strong enough to tough it out through the challenge of marriage and children! So, while this might be a deep thought to have on a regular Tuesday afternoon, I will be holding my best friend responsible for its presence in this column. If there is only one person out there for all of us, which more and more people seem to believe in this day and age, how can we possibly be guaranteed a happy ending? Brutal as the idea might be, it’s one that I’ve been thinking about a lot lately; in a world full of liars and cheats, and people who believe them, how many of us will actually be lucky enough to find someone we can tolerate, and who can tolerate us in return, enough for us to spend the rest of our lives with them?
There is someone out there for everyone, and I’m of the school of thought that there is probably more than just one someone because I don’t think any higher power would want it to be that difficult for us to pair off, but with threesomes, polyamorous relationships and people who change their partners more than their underwear, how are we meant to sift through the rubble to find our own diamond? People are constantly falling in and out of love, and I’m seeing lately that love seems to be much more fickle than I ever imagined, or perhaps the people who are feeling love are fickle, either way, it seems to pass with a swiftness that I personally can’t comprehend. With feelings and emotions changing at such a rate, people being gay one minute straight the next, hating you one day and loving you another – has it become practically impossible to find someone who’s emotions aren’t fickle and who’s words are true?
Everyone seems to rely on divorce to finish a marriage, the courts to divide up time with your children and technology to finish any average Joe relationship that isn’t worth a face-to-face meeting, it seems that nowadays finding and keeping your happy ending is borderline impossible because people just can‘t resist the temptation of what may or may not be a better option! But then, on reflection, is a happy ending based around the presence of a relationship in your life? Or is it based on your quality of life, your friends, your family and everything in between that makes your life what it is? It seems these days that certain people are too dependent on having a relationship – yes, it’s nice to have the support of another person in your life, but you don’t need someone to share your bed with to have that. The optimist in me reassures me that there is a happy ending, for most people in fact, and that more often than not, despite what people think, it’s got absolutely nothing to do with the relationship you’re in, or the relationship you aren’t in for that matter… .